3"x3" landscape in acrylic, of Glacier National Park, MT |
HOW MUCH I HAVE GROWN IN MY ART
ATITUDE!
This is an excerpt from my art
journal 5 years ago. Upon reading it, I
realize how far I have come in my confidence.
----"Why do I panic at the
thought of finishing a painting? For me,
I know the exact moment I was warped for life....my high school art teacher
would encourage and instruct me - until I came to the finish of the
project. Then she would take my painting
away from me and finish it herself. That
told me that she was sure I would ruin a painting should I ever finish
one. So I never finish a painting
without a LOT of panic, double-guessing, and anxiety. I need others to tell me
if it is good or not. I feel NEEDY, and worse, I feel like the art is no longer
MINE. I have compromised my own feelings
and emotions and put in someone else's.
How's THAT for self-sabotage?!
At one point, I was so frustrated
with my inability to finish a painting that I started using smaller and smaller
canvases. I was eventually painting
2"x3" pieces...and still unable to complete them. Worse, if you have ever talked to a
miniatures artist, they are much harder to do than the larger one. Great care has to be taken on a small surface
to use it properly - composition has to be perfect. Values must be perfect. I had inadvertently painted myself into a
corner..."