Sunday, December 30, 2012

HOW MUCH I HAVE GROWN IN MY ART ATITUDE!


3"x3" landscape in acrylic, of Glacier National Park, MT
 
 
HOW MUCH I HAVE GROWN IN MY ART ATITUDE!

This is an excerpt from my art journal 5 years ago.  Upon reading it, I realize how far I have come in my confidence.

----"Why do I panic at the thought of finishing a painting?  For me, I know the exact moment I was warped for life....my high school art teacher would encourage and instruct me - until I came to the finish of the project.  Then she would take my painting away from me and finish it herself.  That told me that she was sure I would ruin a painting should I ever finish one.  So I never finish a painting without a LOT of panic, double-guessing, and anxiety. I need others to tell me if it is good or not. I feel NEEDY, and worse, I feel like the art is no longer MINE.  I have compromised my own feelings and emotions and put in someone else's.  How's THAT for self-sabotage?!

At one point, I was so frustrated with my inability to finish a painting that I started using smaller and smaller canvases.  I was eventually painting 2"x3" pieces...and still unable to complete them.  Worse, if you have ever talked to a miniatures artist, they are much harder to do than the larger one.  Great care has to be taken on a small surface to use it properly - composition has to be perfect.  Values must be perfect.  I had inadvertently painted myself into a corner..."

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